Adam Ullian: When did you start doing comedy?

Whitney Cummings: I started doing stand-up about five years ago. I moved out to Los Angeles and I was doing a couple TV shows before I was actually doing stand-up. I did Punk’d on MTV, and then I did Best Week Ever on VH1. I was working with a lot of comedians. I wasn’t a comedian yet, but I segued into it. The thing about stand-up is you can really only get better on stage when you’re working, so the more time you put into it, the more you get out it. Out of the gate, I was really obsessive about doing two or three spots a night. I was killing myself for stage-time, doing four open mics around L.A from 6:00 p.m. to 2:00 a.m. I think I kind of expedited it a little bit.

AU: How do you compare improv with standup?

WC: I used to think improv was what people did when they couldn’t do stand-up. They want to be on stage but they’re too lazy to write. I used to think improv was just like guessing.  I never wanted to go to a show and be like, “Hey, let’s watch people guess.”  Then I realized, from people like Robin Williams and Paul Scheer, that, “Oh my god, improv is a real gift.” It’s a skill — it’s something you hone. It’s something that not everyone can do.  I feel like everyone thinks they can do improv, like it’s an easy thing you can do if you’re funny.  I did a show with Robin Williams near San Francisco, and we were messing around doing improv afterwards, and it was unbelievable to watch his mind. He was always a step ahead, going in and out of the most insane impressions and characters. It was staggering — almost mind-boggling insane.

AU: Is it tougher being a female comic?

WC: It’s tough being a comic, period. A lot of times, guy comics don’t get the appreciation they need or deserve because people feel like it’s easier being a guy comic. I think a lot of women don’t gravitate toward it and choose it because it’s such a full-time job and such a sacrifice. My schedule right now is starting at 7:00 p.m. until 1:00 in the morning, and every single night I’m doing stand-up. I’m going to be on the road six days a week for the next four months. I’ll be home one day a week.  I think guys would accept that schedule a lot more readily than women, so I think a lot of women just don’t choose it. It’s not that they fail at it; they just don’t see it as something they would enjoy because they want relationships and aren’t dead inside, like me.

AU: So female comics might not be prepared as well for the spotlight?

WC: A lot of women get exposure before they’re ready. It takes a really long time to find your voice and to be comfortable on stage and to have a good solid hour. Even when you think you’re good, you’re not. At the three- or four-year mark, everyone thinks they’re good, and then it’s like, “Oh shit, I only have 15 minutes. Now I have to write an hour.” Everyone sucks two years in, but everyone’s not looking at the guys — they’re looking at the girls. At the same time, people like Chelsea Handler are doing a great job of putting female comics on television, so I’m noticing less groans when I see a woman go onstage.

AU: Is it tough to be on the road, or is it something you get used to?

WC: It’s something I’m getting used to. It’s not something you ever really get used to, because every time you do, you go to a new town or a new hotel. It’s incredibly rewarding because of the amount of stage-time you get. If you’re doing three shows, you get three or four hours a night. I’m getting ready to do my hour special, so to me it’s completely worth it. If I wasn’t getting ready to do an hour special, I definitely wouldn’t be out on the road as much because it’s really hard and it gets exhausting. However, I get so much work done on the road because I’m isolated in a hotel room. When you’re in a hotel room for six days in the middle of nowhere, it’ll drive you nuts. The strongest comics have the most experiences. The more cities you go to and the more people you meet and the more circumstances you encounter, the more material you have.

AU: Do you have a favorite topic?

WC: I’m actually very picky about what I talk about on stage. I really just want to focus on sex and relationships. I basically want to pick up where Sex and the City left off with my stand-up, so even if I think about jokes about other things, I’m really not interested in putting them in my act.  The key is to only talk about things that interest you. Politics aren’t funny to me — they’re just depressing. I want people to know what they’re gonna get when I come to town. I get a lot of girls’ nights and bachelorette parties, and miserable boyfriends are getting dragged along.

AU: Would you consider dating Senator-Elect Scott Brown?

WC: No..no…no…no…no…no. Absolutely not. I would never do that. I don’t have space in my brain to obsess about people being so hot. I don’t fantasize about men I don’t have any access to. When I see a guy who’s in good shape, I don’t think, “Oh, he’s so sexy.” I tend to think, “Oh, he spent two hours at the gym. Ugh. He can’t possibly be interesting.”  Be healthy, take care of your body…but to go to the gym to get ripped is a little rapey.

Check out whitneycummings.com to find her on tour this month.