Beowulf

The tale of Beowulf, written in the 12th century, is a fairly complex story, considering its age, and is certainly classic in its lines. Our strapping champion, Beowulf (Ray Winstone), comes to the aid of an ailing kingdom led by drunken King Hrothgar (Anthony Hopkins) and finds himself not only fighting a deadly demon (Grendel, played by Crispin Glover), but the monster’s mommy (played by Angelina Jolie) as well. Along the way, the King falls, Beowulf takes the crown, and the Queen (Robin Wright Penn) falls in love with a younger girl (Alison Lohman) and slays a dragon–all in a day’s work, when you’re a legendary hero.

Unfortunately, the movie feels like a day’s work when it comes to the viewing experience. The tedium is compounded if you watch the movie in 3-D and I-MAX (as I did, coming away with a headache and eyestrain). But even without the added in-your-face CG elements, Beowulf is more a chore than a cheer. The characters, each one rendered with overlay ala Polar Express (Beowulf is brought to us by the same animation-amped director, Robert Zemeckis), are hard to relate to on a human level; straddling an uneasy line between fantasy and reality, this embellishing technique is more irritating than impressive.

Enchanted

It’s a given that everyone would like to escape the grind of everyday life and live in fantasyland for while, but what about the flipside to that–fantasy characters finding themselves thrust into the real world?

That’s the idea behind Disney’s new self-effacing romantic comedy, Enchanted, and it works like a charm. Employing their classic 2-D presentation of yore, the animators show us a tale of hope, romance, greed and betrayal, all in about 10 minutes; then line drawings become live action when Princess-to-be Giselle (Amy Adams) is cast out of the idyllic kingdom by the evil Queen (Susan Sarandon) and sent to present-day New York City.

Wide-eyed, rosy-cheeked Giselle is naïve and vulnerable to say the least, but fortunately, a gallant guy (Patrick Dempsey) comes to her aid. On the heels of her glass slippers is Giselle’s intended, Prince Edward (James Marsden), then behind him is the evil queen’s henchman (Timothy Spall), a cute chipmunk called Pip, and finally the nasty nemesis herself. This big picture hits all the tried and true notes: bursting into song, spontaneous romances, talking animals, black magic spells, and true love triumphing over all.

Enchanted sounds conceited and cutesy–and it sometimes is–but the actors are so well cast and the script so well written, that even the most skeptical of viewers will eventually wind up in its sweetly syrupy spell.

Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium

Mr. Magorium (Dustin Hofman) is a 243-year-old “toy impresario, wonder aficionado, avid shoe-wearer,” and the manager of a magical store where kids and their parents delight in finding the most unusual playthings on the planet. Magorium’s right-hand girl is perturbed pianist and shy wallflower Molly Mahoney (Natalie Portman), and his best friend is a lazy house-zebra named Mortimer–not your average character, to say the least.

Unfortunately, the film feels very average indeed. Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium is Zach Helm’s directorial debut; he wrote the delightful Stranger Than Fiction for director Marc Forster last year, but here his too-linear, trite, and altogether bland story falls flat. Hoffman is excellent as ever but over-the-top with a combo of crazy costuming, slippery speech and manic mannerisms. Portman goes the other way entirely, underplaying Molly to the point of transparency, allowing their lesser-known costar (Jason Bateman) to shine with the truest performance in the film.

While there are a few chuckles, some clever moments with the toys (there’s an especially adorable sock monkey), and a likeable adolescent protagonist (portrayed winsomely by Zach Mills), Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium just doesn’t muster the magic.

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